Winter lessons
I woke up today for the first time in months, feeling like me again. It seems for years now, from about November - mid March I slowly fall to pieces inside. I try every year to keep myself in one piece, at least on the outside. I understand why it happens. But understanding doesn’t make it feel any better. Grief is a long dark journey that is often very lonely, and gray winter days don’t help much. I have learned to brace for the impact winter will undoubtedly try to crush me with. But often that is not my best self. I’m stronger than this, I’m braver than this, so I smile, I fight on, I fight anything and everything that will take my punches, especially myself. My self talk becomes negative and I doubt everything and everyone in my life, including myself. I become someone I am not proud of, I stop taking care of myself, and I slowly fall apart, I survive winter in what ever way I have to, at times, floundering, grasping at str...